The Knitting Gods aka Mira

I love knitting (duh!) and I read last night in Free Range Knitter about knitter confidence. I like to think that I have a healthy dose of that. But I also know the sorrows of getting penisy. There are moments when you proudly exclaim that you have knitted up something wonderful and beautiful and … what the HECK is that?!?!

It’s the tummy flopping moment when you realize that you have messed up 5 rows back and Helen Keller could see this mistake coming from a mile away. So, you have no choice to rip back. Now, admittedly this usually happens with a lace piece that has so many yarn overs and decreases that you can’t rip back and you spend about twice as long tinking back.

I call this the knitting gods. The knitting gods are not jealous. They want you to knit well. They even want you to create masterpieces of knits and purls and yarn overs. They want you to succeed. However, the knitting gods hate it when you get all penisy. They want you to be humble. They would like you to nod demurely, looking up through your eyelashes like a proper coquette when someone compliments your knitting. They do not want you to make a huge fuss. (Which of course being human, vain, and self-proud, we do… and do so often.)

Knitting is a feat. It is a test of your will over the yarns sometimes. On occasion it is so much work that one row of 31 stitches confounds you so that you feel as if you have just completed a sprint after each row. Each row feels like a victory. (I’m looking at you Branching Out scarf!) You can’t help but to finish and exclaim: AHA! I have defeated you. I have knit you with expensive silk and wool. I have made you beautiful. I am one heckuva Knitter!!! But the knitting gods hate that and thus when you go to count to 31…. There are only 28 stitches! How did you get 28??!?! That’s when you know you are getting penisy and the gods are forcing you to tink back to the first 4 stitches.

Now, all bets are off after you have bound off, weaved the ends in, hand washed and blocked the piece. Then, you can get knitting penisy. Just don’t hold your work near a candle or anything sharp when you do.

 

Ps. I call my knitting goddess Mira.